I was procrastinating on an important decision recently and one of my friends helped me to make a choice without giving any of her input at all. She simply trusted that I would make the correct decision for myself and continued to regularly ask me what I had decided. She never once tried to sway me one way or the other. Finally, after weeks of checking in with me she asked me again. I told her that I just wasn’t sure what to do. I was concerned I could possibly make the wrong choice so I just wasn’t going to make a choice. This time however, she simply said “What would it look like if I…” and that’s really all she needed to do. I took a moment to look at the possible scenarios and knew that the best thing I could do for myself was what I was avoiding all along. (Interesting how we do that, isn’t it?) So right then, I told her what I was going to do and the next day I acted on that decision. I felt so good that I make that decision. I felt confident about it and my friend lovingly helped me to make the choice on my own.
It was truly a beautiful process, a friend helping me in a time of uncertainty. She never pushed me or got impatient and she never gave up on me. She never even gave her opinion. She simply encouraged me to imagine the possibilities of my choices and trusted me to make the decision. There’s a little more to it than that I guess. She believed in me. She reminded me in a quiet way that I had the strength within myself. She held me in a space of love and trust and it empowered me. It was wonderful and I’m inspired to help others the same way when they are faced with decisions or uncertainty.
What if we approached everyone in our lives that way? What if we wake up in the morning and immediately trust those in our lives to also make the correct decisions? What if we hold them in such a space of love and trust that they feel empowered to be themselves and to do the right things? I hope and pray that when my children are faced with a choice, they will see the possible paths, feel my love and confidence in them and then make a self-reliant decision. So what if we all do that for our children? What if did the same for our family, our friends and our coworkers? What if we even did the same for strangers? Just image the love and empowerment that each of them would feel. We really need to do the same for ourselves too. I need to remind myself over and over that I am perfectly capable of knowing for myself and what the right things to do are. I should believe in myself. I DO believe in myself… and I believe in you, too.